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Santa Banta Jokes-III

Once Santa was coming out of Airport. As there was huge rush the security guard told "WAIT SIR" for which santa replied "65Kgs" and moved on...

A man jumped into the river and never came back. Another man jumped, he also did not return. Santa's conclusion: man is soluble in water

Teacher: What is the axis of the Earth? Santa: The axis of the Earth is an imaginary line which passes from one pole to the other, and on which the Earth revolves. Teacher: Very good. Now, could you hang clothes on that line? Santa: Yes, sir. Teacher: Indeed, and what sort of clothes? Santa: Imaginary clothes, sir.

Santa:Papa aaj meri Girl4nd ki birhday he. Use kya du..?
Papa:Dekhne me kaisi hai?
Santa:Mast hai..
Papa:Mera mobile number de de! 

Santa jawan hua to uske pariwar ki budhi bhua shaadi ya samajik samarohon main mauke-bemauke kabhi bhi aakar chikoti kaat jaati aur kahti ,”Beta ab tumhari baari hai.” Santa ki yah samasya tab khatam hui jab martyu ya shok samarohon main panhuchne par woh usi budhi bhua ke paas jata aur bolta :- ab tumhari baari hai , bhuaji. 

Santa Singh: "My doctor told me to drink carrot juice after a hot bath to cure my cold."
Banta Singh: "Does it work?" Santa Singh: "I don't know... I can never finish drinking the hot bath."

Santa Singh and Banta Singh were sitting on a tree and Santa Singh was singing a song.After 4 songs Santa Singh hung himself upside down and started singing again. Banta Singh : Santa Singh, what is the matter with you? Why are you hanging upside down? Santa Singh : I am singing the B side.

Santa and his two friends are talking at a bar. His first friend says, "I think my wife is having an affair with the electrician. The other day I came home and found wire cutters under our bed and they weren't mine."

His second friend says, "I think my wife is having an affair with the plumber, the other day I found a wrench under the bed and it wasn't mine."

Santa says, "I think my wife is having an affair with a horse." Both his friends look at him with utter disbelief. "No I'm serious. The other day I came home and found a jockey under our bed." 

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