Just Joking

A sales clerk asked his boss how to handle people who complained about the current prices compared to the low prices in the good old days.

“Just act surprised and tell them you didn’t think that they were old enough to remember them.”

Resolving to surprise her husband, an executive’s wife stopped by his office.

When she opened the door, she found him with his secretary sitting in his lap.

Without hesitating, he dictated, “…and in conclusion, gentlemen, budget cuts or no budget cuts, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair.”

A lady manager of a large office noticed a new man one day and told him to come into his office.

“What is your name?” was the first thing she asked the new guy.

“John,” the new guy replied.

She scowled, “Look… I don’t know what kind of a namby-pamby place you worked before, but I don’t call anyone by their first name.

It breeds Familiarity and that leads to a breakdown in authority.

I refer to my employees by their last name only … Smith, Jones, Baker … that’s all I am to be referred to only as Mrs. Robertson.

Now that we got that straight, what is your last name?”

The new guy sighed, “Darling. My name is John Darling.”

“Okay John, the next thing I want to tell you is . . .

Tom had this problem of getting up late in the morning and was always late for work. His boss was mad at him and threatened to fire him if he didn’t do something about it. So Tom went to his doctor who gave him a pill and told him to take it before he went to bed. Tom slept well and in fact beat the alarm in the morning by almost two hours. He had a leisurely breakfast and drove cheerfully to work.

“Boss”, he said, ” The pill actually worked!”

“That’s all fine” said the boss, ” But where were you yesterday?”