Husband Wife Jokes

Husband: Bhagwan ne tumhe 2 aakhen di hai chawal se pathar nhi nikal sakti?
WIFE: Bhagwan ne tumhe 32 daat diye hai 2-4 pathar nhi chaba sakte?

Husband aur Wife Hotel me gaye tabhi 1 Lady ne Hello kiya,
Wife nay pocha, Koun Thi Wo?
Husband:-Tum dimagh kharab mat karo, main pehle hi pareshan hun kyo ki woh bhi abhi ye hi puchane wali hai.

Husband & wife are like liver and kidney.
Husband is liver & wife is kidney.
If liver fails, kidney fails.
If kidney fails, liver manages with other kidney.

Husband:u will never succeed in making that dog obey u!
Wife:Nonsense its only a matter of patience, I had a lot of trouble with u at first.

Wife: yesterday-night I saw a dream That u were sending me Jewelry and clothes!
Husband: yeah, I saw your dad paying the bill

Thappar Maarnay par NaraZ Wife se Husband bola:
Aadmi usi ko maarta hai jis se Pyaar krta hai.
Wife ne Husband ko 2 thappar maaray aur Boli Aap kya samajh te hain main Aapse Pyaar nahi kerti

Husband 2 Wife : Did u Have any boyfriend before marriage ??
Wife remains silent
Husband : Mai is Khamoshi ko kya samjhu ??
Wife : Abbe gin ne to De

Man: is there any medicine for long life?
Doctor: get married
man: will it help?
Doc: no, but it will avoid such thoughts

Pati ke marne ke bad patni ne akhbaar mein add diya..
Antim sanskar mein jo bhi aaye uske liye dhanyavad.
from:-
Kajal,
Age 26
Gora rang,
36 24 36,
Bachche nahi hai

Husband to wife,
na kajre ki dhar,
na motiyo ki haar,
na koi kiya singar,
fir bi itni sundr ho..
Wife: Saaf-saaf bolo
make up ke liye paise nahi dunga.

Wife on Mobile: kaha ho aap?
Santa : Tumhe wo jwellry shop yaad hai jaha tumhe 1 diamond ka set bahut pasand aya tha,
par mere pas paise nahi they aur maine wada kiya tha 1 din dilwaunga.
Wife: Khush hote huye.. Ha ha mjhe sab yaad hai.
Santa : Ha to usi shop ke baju wali shop pe baal katwa raha hu.

Kidnapper phone par: Teri biwi mere kabze mein hai. saboot ke taur par uski do ungliyan bhijwa di hain.
Santa: Sabut pakka nahi hai, mundi bhej mundi

Teacher: Why has the Govt. fixed voting age 18yrs & marriage age 21yrs?
Student: Govt. ko pata hai ki desh sambhalna aasan hai, lekin biwi ko nahi.

Wife: Ager main kho gayi to tum kya kroge?
Santa: Nirmal Baba ke pas jaunga
Wife: kitne achche ho, kya kahoge?
Santa: Kahunga,
baba aap ki kripa aana shuru ho gayi

Santa GOD Se.....
Tune bachpana diya cheenliya,
jawani di cheenli,
paisa diya wapas le liya,
ab ye biwi di hai to de kar lena bhool gaya...?

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