Just Joking

A junior in office dialed his boss's number by mistake & said: Hey, send a coffee in my cabin in 2 minutes

Boss Shouted: Do u know who you are talking to?

Jr: No!

Boss: I'm boss of office.

Jr(in same tone):& do you know who you are talking to?

Boss: No!

Junior: THANK GOD .. And disconnected the phone :)

Human resource manager to an applicant: "Before our company accepts you to work here, I need to know if you are often late and if you tend to tell lies and steal things?"

"No. But if the company needs this kind of people I can learn quickly."

My boss walked past my desk and asked me: "Why are you not working?"

I replied "Because I never saw you coming Sir".

Arguing with your Boss is Like Wrestling With a Donkey in the Mud. After some Time You Will Realize that You are Getting Dirty and the Donkey is Enjoying it..!

Employee: I got to have salary increment. Three other companies are after me.

Boss: Really? Which are the three companies?

Employee: The electric company, the telephone company and the gas company

Sardar sent SMS to his BOSS: "Me sick, no work"

Boss SMS back: "When I am sick I kiss my wife try it"

2 hours later sardar sms 2 boss: "Me ok, ur wife very sweet"

Interviewer: Do you think you can handle a variety of work?

Candidate: Yes I think so, I have worked in 10 different places in the last 3 months.

Once, Boss, Officer & Clerk going 4 a meeting. They saw a Jin. Jin said: As i fulfill 3 wishes at a time

But u r 3 persons so i will fulfill 1 wish for each.

Clerk said: Send me to America with a lot of money clerk disappears. (wish fulfilled)

Officer said: Send me to Paris with a lot of beautiful girls. officer disappears. (wish fulfilled)

Jin said to Boss: what is ur wish?

He said: "I want these two idiots back at office after lunch."

Moral: Always Let the BOSS SPEAK 1st

When design engineers get together they often talk about football.

When Middle management meet, they talk about tennis.

When top management meet they talk golf.

Conclusion: The higher you climb in the corporate ladder the smaller your balls become.

Employer: "In this job we need someone who is responsible."

Applicant: "I'm the one you want. On my last job, every time anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."

Sardar Bunks office n goes to home. He saw his wife with his boss. He comes back running office and says,

'baap re, boss ne dekh liya hota to maar daalta.

IN PRISON... you spend the majority of your time in an 8X10 cell.

AT WORK... you spend the majority of your time in a 6X8 cubicle.

IN PRISON... you get three meals a day.

AT WORK... you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for it.

IN PRISON... you get time off for good behavior.

AT WORK... you get more work for good behavior.

IN PRISON... the guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.

AT WORK... you must carry around a security card and open all the doors for yourself.

IN PRISON... you can watch TV and play games.

AT WORK... you get fired for watching TV and playing games.

IN PRISON... you get your own toilet.

AT WORK... you have to share with some idiot who pees on the seat.

IN PRISON...they allow your family and friends to visit.

AT WORK...you can't even speak to your family.

IN PRISON... all expenses are paid by the taxpayers with no work required

AT WORK... you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for prisoners.

IN PRISON... you spend most of your life inside bars wanting to get out.

AT WORK... you spend most of your time wanting to get out and go inside bars.

IN PRISON... you must deal with sadistic wardens.

AT WORK... they are called managers.

So why is it, again, that we work?