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One Line Jokes



My girlfriend asked me, "Do You believe in love at first sight"? I said, "At the first sight of what"?

I don't believe in miracles. I rely on them.

Don’t take life too seriously, nobody gets out alive anyhow.

Sacred cows make the best burgers.

The trouble with life is that you’re halfway through before you realize it is a do-it yourself thing.

Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?

If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory.

A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.

A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.

A will is a dead giveaway.

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

A backward poet writes inverse.

A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..

Some people are like Slinkies ... not really good for anything, but you can't help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.

Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?

A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don't need it.

I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.

The email of the species is more deadly than the mail.

Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity. (You can say that again).

Rehab is for quitters.

We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse.


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